That Fool of a Took
by Strawbaby Chick
Summary: Peregrin Took. Oh, he makes me angry. Merry is my brother - why does he have to get in the way? Or, more importantly, why does he make me feel like this? PippinXOC
1. Chapter 1

**This is my Pippin love story! I hope you enjoy, and by the way, I'm looking for Lord of the Rings co-authors if anyone is interested, pm me!**

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><p><strong>That Fool of a Took<strong>

**Peregrin Took Love Story **

**Chapter One-**

"Get the big one!" Merry shouted to Pippin and I.

"This one?" Pippin asked, holding a nicely sized red firework. Trying to outdo Pippin's and impress Merry, I felt my soft green-coloured eyes widen.

"Check this out!" I held up a huge firework, that slightly resembled a dragon.

It Merry's turn to let his eyes widen, "_That's_ the one".

We all scrambled to get out of the cart, me having the hardest time with the fire work that was probably as big as I was.

Tossing the firework to Merry, I stood under the tent and looked at it in satisfaction. That outta outdo that Took.

Merry didn't pay me half the attention he did to Pippin, and it wasn't fair! I was his adoptive sister, didn't that beat cousin? It did. Just not best friend.

Merry stuck the firework in the ground, and lit it. He immaturely pushed it at Pippin, "Put it in the ground!". Pippin, not surprisingly, pushed it back at him, "It _is_ in the ground!".

Then, I noticed something that one of us should have noticed sooner.

"Wait!" I cried, running towards them, "We're under a tent!".

They looked at each other, then at me. Then we all looked at the fuze.

Oops.

The firework shot off, taking the tent with it, and sending us all to the ground, singed black.

I stared, wide-eyed, at the firework. It did look like a dragon. A very vivid dragon. I gaped at it, as screams erupted from the party.

The dragon flew very close to the ground, towards the hobbits at the party, then, when everyone thought they were safe, it circled around, flying again at the poor hobbits. Then it burst out by the lake, causing a beautiful scene.

There was a chorus of "Ooh"s and "Ahh"s, then deafening applause.

Merry laid a hand on my shoulder, "Good pick".

A smile tilted my lips, but Merry and Pippin's yelps caused it to flee, and probably rock itself in a hole and sucking its thumb.

"Meriadoc Brandybuck" I whirled around to see Gandalf the Gray holding Merry and Pip's ears, "And Peregrin Took".

"Aren't you forgetting somebody?" I asked, smiling sheepishly at the wizard, "You know, it was _my_ idea".

Merry shot me a somewhat grateful look.

"Saphira Brandybuck" Gandalf released Merry and Pippin, who immediately tried to scurry away, but stayed put when Gandalf gave them a stern look.

"That's what they call me" I replied, shooting my oh-so-loyal brother and cousin a glare. "It was all my fault, I picked the fire work and I set it off as well".

"Indeed" he answered.

I prepared myself for a scolding. But much to my surprise, the old wizard laughed, and I darted my gaze from side to side. He was laughing. That was never a good sign for us.

"Well, I suppose you all deserve punishment then, don't you?".

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><p>"Eep!" I squealed as Merry splashed cold water at me, "STOP! Its cold!".<p>

He laughed, flicking water at me from a wet rag.

"Oh, it is? I never would have thought" Merry smiled brightly at me, and I couldn't help but smile back. He's got one of those smiles that makes you want to smile, you know?

"Incoming!" Merry tossed a plate at me, and I caught it, drying it with my towel. Pippin brought in another load of dirty plates and bowls. He looked unhappy.

"I can't believe that we have to wash dishes while the rest of the family gets to hear the dinner speech" he scoffed, pulling a plate from the pile and started to wipe it in a irritated fashion.

"Because you obviously wanted to go so badly" I retorted, leaping to catch his badly thrown plate.

He smiled faintly at me, and Merry's eyes twinkled.

"Well, at least we have an extra pair of hands" Merry pointed out, winking at me, "Nice job trying to cover up for us".

"What do you mean? I was a part of it!" I argued, smiling at him.

"Of course you were, little sister of mine" I glared, although the title made my stomach flutter. A sister. I was a sister.

"I'm barely younger than you, Merry" I said, catching two plates as both of the boys threw it at the same time.

"As old as Pip" Merry answered, "Obviously still a child".

"Hey!" Pippin hit him in the side with a towel, "Well, if you want an older sister you can have any of mine- Pimpernel, Pearl, or Pervinca".

Somehow, I managed to catch every dish that was thrown to me. While Merry and Pippin spoke with each other, closer than I could dream of getting with either of them.

"He's gone!" the shriek rang out, and many of Bilbo's relatives walked out of the party. The same look of confusion was on every face.

"What happened?" I asked, stepping closer to Merry.

Pippin answered, "I think somebody might be gone".

Merry and I rolled our eyes. That was such a Pippin-like answer.

"Meriadoc! Saphira! Come on children!" Saradoc shouted. I smiled as he called. Even when my name was new, he never managed to forget me.

"Hello father" Merry said, walking over to meet with his father.

I, on the other hand, squealed "Daddy!" and ran over to him.

His cheeks didn't even redden. Saradoc was used to me.

"We better go get your mother" he said, looking over to where a group of Tooks were. Esmeralda was formerly a Took before she married Saradoc.

Saradoc waved before joining his wife. Glancing over, I saw Pippin's gaze glued to where people were leaving the party.

Then, like lightning, he shot out, tackling a dark haired hobbit.

"Pip! Its not nice to tackle your cousins!" Merry scolded, pulling Pippin off of the hobbit.

I recognized it as Frodo, and, not able to think of anything to say, I burst out with, "Happy Birthday!"

I blushed as he laughed.

Turning to Pippin, he said "I swear, you never leave me be!"

Pippin grinned broadly, "Well, I won't deny that!".

We all laughed.

Frodo stood and dusted himself off, "Well, I'm sorry, but I must be off".

The hobbit ran off to his hobbit-hole, kicking up dust as he went.

"That was spazzy" Pippin commented, hitting my shoulder lightly, "That happy birthday of yours".

I frowned, adjusting my dress. It was very uncomfortable, that dumb old dress.

Merry grabbed my hand, and yanked me towards Saradoc and Esmeralda, who were waving us over, "Come on Saphira!".

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><p>"You aren't even a real Baggins!" Lobelia spat, obviously unhappy that Bilbo had only given her spoons. Nice silver spoons, but still spoons.<p>

Merry and I sent each other worried glances. We should have known this would happen if we stayed to help Frodo give stuff from the will.

Every hobbit from anywhere relatively close was crowded around, trying to smuggle little unnoticeable stuff from the house. Frodo had explained that Bilbo had disappeared.

"Hey Saphira! Bilbo left you this!" Frodo called from the other room, a look of melancholy on his face from Lobelia's comment.

"Thanks!" With a pause I added, "Don't mind Lobelia, she's got something I her mind that messes her up".

Looking at my gift, I saw it was a beautifully crafted sword with Elven characters along the middle. I had no idea what it said, but anything in Elvish was most likely cool.

The sheath was shiny silver scale-like skin, with a blue gem on it.

Almost as if it was made for me.

That would have been way too weird.

"You- you" Lobelia fumed, "You're a Brandybuck!".

This time Frodo laughed, and Lobelia stormed out.

"Hear that Merry? That's an insult if you like" Frodo shouted over.

Merry smiled mischievously, "A compliment, Mister Baggins. Yet, so very not true". With a giant grin plastered on his face, he added, "You obviously didn't inherit Saphira and my sexiness".


	2. Chapter 2

**I AM BACK BABY! WOOOOOOSH! KA-BAM! Sorry, I'm just excited. . . ****Thanks to all of my reviewers!**

**To Rubiie - I know what you mean, he's adorable!**

**To RainbowsAndSmiles - Yes. . . That is something that might never be cured X)**

**To Trouble in the Night - I AM HERE! And yes! And awwz, thankies!**

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><p>"Farmer Maggot knows that it's you!" I pant, feeling a bitguilty. Maybe stealing crops is something. . . Guilt-worthy? Apparently. But I guess it's obvious. . . Pippin and Merry just <em>look <em>like they would do it.

Our trio runs through fields, each of us holding as many carrots as we can carry. Except for Pippin, who's holding some cabbage because he thinks that he's ever-so-special. Unsurprisingly, I'm carrying the most vegetables, so the boys are quickly far ahead of me.

Then I hear a chorus of "oof!"s and Pippin's "Frodo?"

"WHERE!" I screech, pushing my short hobbit legs as fast as they would go. "I WANNA TALK TO COUSIN FRODO!"

That's how I ended up at the top of a pile of hobbits and vegetables. Just shake for Hobbit Salad.

As we all start to stand up and brush ourselves off, there's a distant sound of barking.

I push Merry and Pippin to their hairy feet and start to push, "Go, go, go!"

"Hey Merry, it's Frodo Baggins!" Pippin laughs, not paying any attention to my urgent pushing. Shame on that boy.

Merry starts to pile the dropped vegetables into poor, unsuspecting Samwise's arms. The barking grows louder and makes them finally realize 'Hey, there are vicious dogs after us'.

"It was only a couple carrots!" Merry yells irratably.

"And some cabbages," Pippin adds, "And those three bags of potatoes. And those mushrooms from last week, and-"

"Shut up Pip! My point is that he's _clearly _overreacting" Merry interrupts Pippin, who probably would've gone on with a list.

We all kept running until whomever was at the front stopped, causing us all to stop, just managing to not fall down a small cliff. Okay, cliff is probably a bit of an overexaggeration. Of course, Pippin manages to ram into me, ramming into the others. And we all fall _down. _

Right into a little hobbit pile in the center of a dirt road.

"Ew, Pippin, you smell like dirt. . ." I mumble.

"Very manly smell, isn't it?" He asks with a smile. How charming of him.

Merry and Sam are off, a little down the road, searching for mushrooms. Porky . . . all that runs through his mind is food.

"I think we should get off the road," Frodo muses ahead of us. I peer down where he was gazing and see a dark shadow.

Frodo freezes. "Get off the road!" he shouts. I pull Pippin with me, just because he's the closest, and we all run. We hop under a log and wait. Eventually, the creature and its ugly black horse leave.

We all go off on our way.

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><p>So, after getting chaced once more by one of the black creatures, we make it to the door. Pippin feels the need to shout and point to the door. I feel the need to smack him for stating the obvious. Both of our needs were fufilled.<p>

Frodo knocks on it and a small door above our heads opens. "Hello?" A man peers through, and then notices us down lower. He shuts the door he had been looking though, and opens a door lower. How convienent.

"Hobbits, eh? Don't see many of those 'round these parts. What brings you to Bree?" the man asks.

"We wish to stay at the inn, our business is our own." Frodo replies. How friendly are we?

The man speaks as he opens the door. "Okay, okay. Didn't mean you no offence. Its my job to be asking about people coming into town so late at night."

As we walk in, I overhear Pippin talking to Merry.

"I think your sister has a crush on me." Pippin says nonchalantly.

"Oh really?" Merry takes on a look of interest. "What makes ya say that, Pip?"

"She held my hand under that log," Pippin answers, wiggling his eyebrows at Merry. I blush. Maybe I did, maybe I didn't . . . It didn't mean anything anyway.

"How cute!" Merry laughs. I storm through them, causing them to laugh harder at me. I also storm past Frodo, Sam, and our kindly old guide, right into the inn.

But, the fear of big, drunken men keeps me from walking into. I may be a bit of a wuss. . . Sometimes.

When Pippin sees the Prancing Pony, his eyes light up. "A bar! I knew this trip would be worthwhile!" I roll my eyes. Of all things, this must be what makes it worthwhile to that brick-headed hobbit.

We open the door, and I'm delighted to see a man with a recognizable face.

"MISTER BUTTERBUR!" I screech, launching into his arms. I wrap my own as far as they would go around the fat man.

To say he was surprised would be an understatement. "Well if it isn't little miss Saphira?"

"It _is _she!In the flesh! I've even been raised by hobbits for a while." I say, smiling brightly. "Who knew that you'd still be here, you old oaf."

I untangle myself from him and am delighted to see the flabbergasted looks that my adotive family (and Samwise) are giving me.

"Mr Butterbur, this is my brother Merry, my cousins Frodo and Pippin, and Frodo's friend Samwise." I say, indicating each with a wave of my hand.

"Nice to meet you all!" the man smiles, revealing his grusome yellow teeth. He may be revolting, but I undeniably love that man. He was the father I never had. Honestly, I probably would've been better off if he was my father.


End file.
